Should I Try To Remain?

Should I Try To Remain?

If I strike this posture
will I be an impostor,

but what if assuming
this position is good
for me,

though it goes against
everything that I've
ever thought is true,

blue

I am trying to figure
it out. What I was,
and what I wanted
yesterday,

is not what I am
and is not
what I want now.

Should I try to remain
twelve
eighteen
twenty-seven
thirty-four?

I wore diapers
when I was born,
and I may be
wearing them
as I die,

but I don't want
to wear them
right now.